As I write this on June 2, it still hasn’t completely hit me.
On Monday, my wife and I will be off to St. Louis with our almost 10-month old to do something we never imagined — open heart surgery.
Our little Liv has been a life-changer in so many ways. It was a bit unnerving having a newborn, and she has been a blessing in more ways than I ever imagined.
As of this week, she’s crawling. If you put her on her back and she doesn’t want to lay down, she whips her 15-pound frame around faster than a surprised cat and sits up, staring at you with a look of, “Don’t do that to me again.”
She can pronounce Mama and Dada, though she’s not doing it intentionally yet.
My favorite thing is her call-and-response. If you make a noise at her, she’ll imitate it back, and with a smile that melts every fiber of your being.
In every sense, she is perfect. Unfortunately, she’s a bit like her dad in when it comes to congenital defects.
She was always a little bitty thing, and through her first few months, she dipped into the negative percentile for weight at points.
Concerned about her keeping up, we use a high-calorie mix of formula, and we waited and watched.
Just after the start of the year, Dr. Justin Nowlin at Cox Monett noticed something else concerning — a heart murmur.
Sure enough, confirmed by Dr. Alan Tong in Springfield, our little one has a ventricular septral defect. In short, the wall that separates ventricles of her heart has a hole, which is making the right side of her heart pump low-oxygen blood to the lungs and the left side pump rich-oxygen blood to the rest of her body.
The problem becomes that Olivia’s heart is working too hard to keep up oxygen in her lungs. Her heart overworking is burning up all her calories, hence, why she is so behind in growth.
In a sense, she’s pretty special. Only 42 out of every 10,000 babies have a VSD, about 16,800 per year in the U.S. Still not as rare as her dad though. My congenital upper limb amputation is only 4 in 10,000.
Neither are desirable, and I think us Troutmans can do without any more rare health defects.
Lucky for Liv, hers is curable. The surgery is minimally invasive, and the hospital is ranked No. 17 nationally for pediatric cardiology. Ideally, she will spend a couple days in the NICU recovering, then a few more days at the hospital before returning home.
All that said, it’s still open heart surgery — which is scary — and our baby will have some kind of scar on her chest for the rest of her life.
It hits me more and more every day it gets closer.
Family is a precious thing, and building one of my own is a recent development in my life. Being a dad is a part of me I have always wanted to give, but never could.
Over the past couple of years, I have learned being a dad is much more than just making sure your kids are fed and safe.
It’s being a comfort in the middle of the night during a thunderstorm.
It’s knowing your child’s skills and challenging them to grow.
It’s being emotionally available and considerate, even when you aren’t feeling your best.
It’s doing everything you can as best you can, blindly hoping you are doing it right.
My wife and I spent Sunday revamping our deck, power washing, adding an outdoor futon swing and putting up solar lights to form a trellis and archway at the deck stairs. We also have a TV on a rolling cart that was perfect for watching the Harry Potter series under the stars. We intend to have
We intend to have a great summer swimming, grilling and playing in the backyard, and this is just the hurdle we have to clear to get there.
In recent weeks, many people have extended thoughts, prayers, well-wishes and offers to help. We can’t thank you enough.
A big plus to living in a small community is how tight-knit it can become. We hope you know how much that means to us.
Kyle Troutman has served as the editor of the Cassville Democrat since 2014. In 2017, he was named William E. James/Missouri Outstanding Young Journalist for daily newspapers. He may be reached at 417-847-2610 or ktroutman@cherryroad.com.
