I got put on a sports assignment last week and who should I run into while under the basket? None other than Cassville Superintendent Merlyn Johnson, who was half the whistle for the Exeter Diamond matchup on Thursday. Here we see Dr. J, at right, evaluating a call he may or may not have made. As a journalist, and a fish, I don’t make any judgments. In fact, I enjoy the sportsmanship creed before all games. I think it should inspire some positive criticisms of the refs. For example: “Hey, Zebra! Do you have eagle eyes? Because that was a heck of a great call!” Or maybe, “Hey ref, nice glasses! Can I get that script so I can see the game as well as you?” As a former soccer referee myself, I think we should adopt some positive jeers toward our local human signal-callers. Furthermore, I hope Dr. J runs the floor the same way he runs a school district — with a firm whistle and a smile, like all good referees!

Trout Brown is the comics correspondent for the Cassville Democrat, aiming to point out entertaining happenings in Barry County.