My whole life, I always felt out of place, with no sense of belonging or direction in life.
I knew in my heart something was missing. All the choices that I was making, good or bad, were because I was looking for the missing piece in my life. About five years ago, I was in a season of my life where I was broken and filled with hopelessness without any strength to pick myself back up.
My loving family, and a family friend Cindy Ray, gave me a choice to go to a place called The Dream Center, a year long discipleship. At the time, I didn’t have a clue what surrendering meant, other than the view of worldly possessions.
About four months into my journey of being stripped from social media, cell phones and television my life became quiet, and the void in my heart grew louder. I would ask my mentors what I needed to do, and they would always say, “You need to surrender your life to Jesus.”
By this point, I was frustrated. I didn’t understand what that meant. In my mind, I have already given everything I had and had nothing left to give.
One night at church, I went to the alter, and I decided at that moment that I would say the words to Jesus, “I surrender.”
As soon as those words came out of my mouth, I felt a physical weight being lifted off me. Not understanding what had happened I said those words again, “I surrender,” and it happened again. I could feel a difference. I felt like I could breathe with ease.
I continued until finally I yelled the words with my whole heart and when that happened, I saw the brightest light and in the middle of God’s glory, Jesus was standing there right before me with his arms open wide. I was instantly filled with the Holy Spirit and right in that moment I knew he had been with me my whole life, waiting for me to choose him, so he can take me on a journey of who I’m supposed to be and his plan and purpose for me.
I am currently a Christian Counselor working with a ministry “Loving Grace” in Joplin.
They help young adult women who have fostered out of the system and needs help with transitioning.
I am humbled that Jesus is using me to help change the world one person at a time.
When you surrender everything to Jesus it allows him to shine through you and bring light to others.
“Just so, I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance,” Luke 15:7.
Amanda Reed is a Barry County native and Christian Counselor with Loving Grace in Joplin. People may reach Loving Grace at: 417-218-TALK.
I’m supposed to be and his plan and
purpose for me.”
